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"What do you mean you're a saint?" Do you remember last year I went to that Catholic Church on Broad Street because I was doing that Sociology project on the local religious communities?" Yeah..." Well Father Peter told me that I displayed all the 29 traits required to become a saint, apparently it is unheard of for even the most holy of people to display every saintly quality, especially at such a young age too. He wanted to call the Pope then and there to have me Canonized as soon as possible but I refused." Why the hell did you refuse that?" asked Megan stunned."Because it never happened you doofus." Laughed Danny. "I know I keep saying it but believe me when I say that you really do take gullible to the next level. You believe every word I tell you as if it were canon. You just cannot seem to disbelieve me." That's not true!" protested Megan."The age of consent in Belgium is 42 years of age." What! But how the hell do they keep the population up?" Because it was a lie. I just. “It’s a doll.” replied my brother.“Who would play with something like that?” she replied “And where are her clothes?”“Boy that turkey sure smells nice, Gran,” Jay said, trying to steer her into the dinning room. But Granny was relentless.My grandfather, a delightful old man with poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, “Hey who’s the naked gal by the fireplace?”I told him she was Jay’s friend. A few minutes later I noticed Grandpa by the mantel talking to Louise. Not just talking, but actually flirting. It was then that we realized this might be Grandpa’s last Christmas at home.Dinner went well. We made the usual small talk when suddenly Louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the morning. She then lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. The cat screamed, I passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and Grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth. My brother wet his pants.
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